Parenting Athletes: How We Show Up for Our Children
As parents, we want the best for our children. We pour our time, energy, and emotions into supporting them, especially when it comes to their interests and activities, such as sports. However, it's crucial for us to pause and reflect on the impact of our involvement on our children's experiences.
From the child's perspective, the level of importance we assign to their activities can easily translate into pressure and expectations. Despite our loving intentions, our passionate cheering, endless hours of driving, and enthusiastic feedback at games can inadvertently burden our children with the weight of our expectations. Over my 30 years of working with children in sports, I've witnessed many who have lost their love for the game but feel hesitant to communicate this to their parents, fearing disappointment or a sense of disconnection.
It's essential for us as parents to regularly check in with our children's feelings of satisfaction, joy, and pressure regarding their participation in sports. Similarly, we must examine our own intentions and passions for their involvement. By journaling and asking ourselves why we want our child to play a sport, we can gain clarity on our motivations and ensure our actions align with our intentions.
Actions truly speak louder than words, especially in the eyes of our children. They observe how we show up at their games, how we communicate with coaches and other parents, and how we handle victories and defeats. It's vital for us to reflect on whether our behaviors reflect the supportive and nurturing environment we aim to create for our children.
Feedback and guidance from parents, no matter how well-intentioned, can often be perceived as judgment by our children. While it's natural to want to offer advice and opinions, it's crucial to resist the urge unless solicited. Instead, we should create space for our children to explore their interests and seek support on their terms. If there are moments where guidance is necessary, particularly concerning character or behavior, it's essential to approach these discussions with empathy and understanding.
As a coach, I've often served as a bridge between parents and children, offering guidance and support in a way that resonates with the child. This dynamic allows parents to step back and see their child's journey from a different perspective, relieving them of the pressure to intervene constantly. It's a symbiotic relationship that fosters growth and understanding for both parents and children.
If anything in this reflection resonates with you or raises questions, I encourage you to reach out for a free consultation. Together, we can ensure that our children's experiences in sports are filled with joy, growth, and love.
