A Question Worth Asking: Why Do Teachers and Coaches Approach Their Roles Differently?
Imagine this: A parent reaches out to their child’s teacher with a question about their progress in class. Maybe the child is struggling with a concept or unsure about an assignment. In most cases, the teacher acknowledges the concern—perhaps responding via email, setting up a meeting, or offering extra help after school. If the teacher is unavailable or unresponsive, the parent can contact the principal, who will typically step in to ensure the conversation happens.
Now, let’s step into the world of youth soccer. A parent reaches out to their child’s coach with a question about their development, playing time, or what they can work on to improve. The response? Sometimes there’s an open dialogue, but other times, the request is met with silence or resistance. Conversations that feel natural in an academic setting often feel much harder to initiate in the soccer world.
This raises an interesting question: Why is that?
Similar Structures, Different Experiences
Private schools and soccer clubs share some core similarities:
Families choose them based on what they believe is the best fit for their child’s growth and development.
The people leading these spaces—teachers and coaches—play a key role in shaping a young person’s learning and experience.
Leadership—whether a principal or a club director—is responsible for upholding the organization’s values and ensuring a positive environment.
Yet, despite these parallels, the way communication and mentorship unfold in each setting can feel quite different.
The Power of a Mentor
A child’s strongest sense of identity often shapes where they seek validation, guidance, and encouragement. Some children feel most connected to their academic self, while others define themselves primarily through their sport.
For a student who struggles in school, feedback from a teacher may be helpful, but if they don’t strongly identify as a student, that feedback might not carry as much emotional weight. However, when a young soccer player—who sees the sport as central to who they are—seeks guidance from a coach, their words have the power to shape that child's confidence, motivation, and belief in themselves.
This raises another question: When a coach is unavailable, disinterested, or simply too busy to engage with a player in meaningful ways, how does that impact the child? Could it lead to self-doubt or even a loss of passion for the game?
A Conversation Worth Having
In education, there is a clear expectation that teachers will be accessible and engaged with both students and parents. When communication breaks down, there are systems in place to address it. In soccer clubs, this expectation is not always as clearly defined.
Is this simply a difference in culture? Is it the nature of sport, where competition and performance often take precedence over mentorship? Or is it something else?
There’s no single answer, but it seems worth pausing to ask:
What would it look like if soccer clubs embraced mentorship and communication in the same way schools do?
How might that impact young players who see themselves first and foremost as athletes?
If we believe that youth soccer is about development—both as players and as people—how can we create an environment where coaches and directors feel both supported and encouraged to take on that role more fully?
This isn’t about assigning blame or saying one approach is right and another is wrong. It’s about inviting curiosity, reflection, and conversation. Every child benefits from adults who believe in them, whether that’s in the classroom or on the field. What small shifts could we make to ensure that support is felt in every part of their journey?
